Chapter 6 – “The Decision”

The rooster’s crow was a rusty blade scraping against my conscience. Sleep had been a stranger the entire night, replaced by a relentless loop of “Camille or Elena?” Shame burned in my throat as I glanced at the clock – almost nine. Elena, bless her heart, had taken the other room to care for her sick mother.Stepping onto the terrace, the cool mountain air slapped me awake. Elena and her mother were already there, their worried expressions deepening as they saw me.

“You had a good sleep, didn’t you, son? It’s almost nine o’clock,” said Elena’s mother.

“I walked quite a distance yesterday. They said I was almost at Marlboro Hills.”

“Ah… so, Dad, did you see Marlboro Hills already?”

“Not really. I was running out of time, so I headed back to visit the mini rice terraces. Next time, I’ll go there.”

“I see. Dad, do you plan to go out today?”

“Huh? Uh… I’m not sure. We’ll see later.”

“Okay, wait for me before you leave. We’re just going to the clinic in town with mom. We’re leaving, just waiting for you to wake up.”

“We’ll leave you for now, Jeff.”

“Alright, take care.”

“I’ll buy some cooked dishes for our lunch later,” Elena said before they left.

Alone in the house, I paced like a caged animal. The weight of my choice pressed down on me, a suffocating burden. Elena, a future filled with comfort and familiarity. Camille, a passionate whirlwind that threatened to upend everything. I set a deadline for myself – a decision by lunch.

It was almost noon when Elena and her mother returned. Fortunately, I had already cooked some rice. I helped Elena prepare the food on the table.

“Jeff, Elena has a surprise for you later.”

“A surprise Mom? What is it?”

“It’s a surprise, after all. Elena will tell you herself.”

Elena just smiled when she looked at me. I thought maybe she bought something for me in town.

Once the table was set, we started eating. At that moment, I wondered if you were already at the hut. I thought about what would happen if I decided to go with you and leave Sagada. My thoughts were interrupted when Elena tried to feed me some food.

Then, her mother spoke.

“Elena, give Jeff your surprise now.”

“Oh, right.”

“What is it, Mommy?”

“Hold on… you’re too excited.”

Elena stood up and grabbed her shoulder bag. She took something out and handed it to me.

IThe pregnancy test felt like a live grenade in my hand. Positive. Those two red lines burned into my retinas. Relief warred with terror in my chest as I saw Elena’s radiant smile. Elena was pregnant. I couldn’t speak right away.

“Oh, it looks like you’re not excited, Dad.”

Once I collected myself, I squeezed Elena’s hand, a silent apology tangled with a burgeoning sense of responsibility. The turmoil within me remained a locked box, but for now, this child was my anchor. Maybe, I thought with a sliver of hope, the universe had intervened, a divine hand steering me away from a path of destruction.

“I was just surprised, Mommy. But you don’t know how happy I am. I’m going to be a father.”

“… and I’m finally going to be a grandmother. I want you to get married at the courthouse as soon as possible. Just a simple celebration. I don’t want people here to see my daughter pregnant without knowing you got married.”

“Yes, Mom. I’ll call my parents later, and Elena and I will tell them our plans.”

Elena was thrilled with what she heard. I caressed her cheek, and she kissed my hand.

“Oh… finish your meal quickly, Dad. You have plans.”

“Huh… I don’t feel like going out anymore. I’d rather stay here by your side.”

“Aww, my Dad suddenly became sweet. Just yesterday, you were so grumpy.”

I still thought of you amid those conversations. You are the reason I could leave Elena, but now I’ve found a reason not to choose you – Elena’s bearing my first child. I don’t need to think any further, and maybe when you learn why I didn’t meet you at our rendezvous, you’ll understand.

Perhaps I can say that the Lord answered my prayer. Let’s just say that the Lord foresaw the future and knew I would be in this situation, so He granted Elena a child to prevent me from doing something foolish.

This doesn’t mean I now believe in fate… that destiny has wheels. The Lord gave us two gifts. The first is life, and the second is the freedom to make any decision we want. He doesn’t interfere with which path we take. I know that the sadness and failures we experience are not punishments from Him. Those are the results of our wrong decisions.

However, sometimes the Lord does favor those He cherishes. I’m not saying He favored me, but Elena. My fiancée is a very good person. I’m not saying you’re not a good person. I have no right to judge you because I am also not pleasing in the eyes of the Lord.

What’s frightening is karma. I feared that Daniel might be punished for the wrongs he did to you. I also feared we might be punished for the infidelities we committed and the wrong we intended to do. I just hope that since we didn’t go through with our plan, we won’t face retribution.

**********

That night, we were awakened by the continuous honking of a car. Elena and I came out of the room, as did her mother. We peered out the window.

“Mom, could you please open the gate?”

It was Daniel calling.

“Jeff, please open the gate,” her mother said.

I opened the gate. Daniel drove the car in, quickly got out, and opened the back door. You stepped out, almost stumbling, so your husband decided to carry you inside the house.

You were soaking wet, and if I’m not mistaken, you seemed drunk.

Daniel laid you on the sofa in the living room. Their mother quickly went into the bedroom, got a pair of shorts and a t-shirt, and changed you out of your wet clothes. I turned away while they dressed you together.

“Why don’t you ever carry an umbrella when you know it’s the rainy season?” their mother said.

“What happened to Camille?” Elena asked.

“She left the house before noon, said she was going somewhere. She took her shoulder bag and a large plastic bag.”

“Wait, let me wipe her face with warm water,” Elena said.

Daniel continued his story.

“When it got dark and she hadn’t returned, I started looking for her. Someone mentioned that around three o’clock, she bought wine and beer at the store and seemed to head into the woods towards the mini rice terraces. I thought she might be at the hut, so I went there. That’s where I found her.”

I just listened to their conversation. There was nothing I could say. I felt so sorry for your condition. I wanted to blame myself. I hope you can forgive me, but I can’t leave Elena, I can’t abandon the child that soon we’re going to have.

“Her plastic bag was full of clothes. I think Camille was planning to leave me.”

We all fell silent for a moment.

“That’s why, Daniel, you need to think things over. Treat Camille better. She told us she wants to separate from you.”

“Yes, Mom. When I realized she was planning to leave me, I understood that I don’t want to lose her. I’ll try to save our marriage. I’ll try to change, Mom.”

As Elena wiped your face with a cloth soaked in warm water, you suddenly opened your eyes. Our gazes met.

“I thought you loved me. But you didn’t. You just led me on.”

I was shocked when you said that. Elena looked at me, confused.

“Weren’t you satisfied with the way I f—– you? Wasn’t it good enough for you?”

Your words hung heavy in the air, a scathing indictment of my betrayal. Elena’s gaze darted between us, the first crack appearing in the facade of her happiness. It was a confused look, but the seed of doubt was sown.

“Ca… Camille… It’s Jeff… I’m not Daniel.”

“Ha!? Is that so?” you said.

Then you started laughing uncontrollably.

“So, you’re Jeff… not Daniel. Well, sorry then.”

“Oh, it looks like Camille is delirious,” said Elena’s mother.

“Yes, it seems so. She probably mistook Jeff for me,” said your husband.

Relief washed over me as you drifted off to sleep, a temporary truce declared. But Elena’s furrowed brow, a silent storm brewing, sent a fresh wave of unease crashing over me. The weight of my choices, for better or worse, had settled in. The consequences, like a gathering storm, loomed on the horizon.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Chapter 1-A

Chapter 1-B

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5